We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
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Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
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my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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