omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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