Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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