I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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