Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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