at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
