Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
