he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize