Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
