Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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