O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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