i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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