Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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