Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize