It's just like the Real World with babies
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
