I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
