Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
