we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
