so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
