Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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