I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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