I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
