I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
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ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
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Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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