So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
