Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
