Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
