that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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