at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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