It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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