Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
