i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
She's the barista slut.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
