Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
