just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
