Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize