C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
