You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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