your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
we're making bets on your personal life
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize