I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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