Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
