dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I want you more than these girls want KFC
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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