Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
So vagazzling was a success
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
