apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
