8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
