I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
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I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
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I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.