you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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