some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
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Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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