thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
my sisters under your porch take her home
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
God, I missed his penis.
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