so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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