Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I have already put on my inside pants.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize