Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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